Foggy morning reflections

Last night I had dinner (and a martini) with a couple of my friends and I believe it did me a lot of good. I ended up talking on the phone with my good friend A until about 1 in the morning, as well, about so many things, one of which was the miscarriage. I've been really hesitant to talk to anyone about it, because it's been difficult for me, but something I've found to be really interesting is that sometimes talking about it makes me feel better. Why should that surprise me? Not sure, but it does.
I've also been surprised to see that the people who I have the easiest time talking to about it are the ones I don't know that well. I'm not sure if that's a common experience or if I'm just a strange person, but I've definitely noticed it. The new wave of emotion that I've been dealing with has to do with the appropriateness of my mourning; how long should it take? Am I wrong if I start feeling better soon? Why am I eating? I honestly haven't experienced any guilt about what I was doing during the first part of the pregnancy, I mean like if I affected the baby or whatever, but I do strangly experience guilt regarding the amount of time I have spent in mourning. I sometimes feel like I haven't mourned enough, or like I'm wrong to have gone back to school/work so soon. Part of me feels like I owe my unborn child more mourning time.
But then what? Am I supposed to mourn forever? Isn't it healthy, on some level, to have let go of things and to have moved on? I don't know, that's the thing. I don't know what's healthy and I don't know what's acceptable. I even sometimes feel guilty for feeling like I'm ready to start trying for another one again....like I haven't left enough time since the first one....like that's unjust to the one I just miscarried.
I'm not sure what the answer is. I'm not sure when we'll be ready to actually move forward and start trying again. I'm not sure when we should. But even with all that uncertainty, I can certainly say this: I have been forever changed. I'll always know that I once saw that glimpse of excitement because of the first pregnancy, I'll always know that I never got to see my baby's face, and I'll certainly always know that there's no one earth, save maybe H, that will forever love that bean the way that I do.